I have to say that I’m excited — a more targeted diet, coupled with exercise, has made me get closer and closer to my goal weight. However, the more I read in the plus size fashion world, the less I feel as if I deserve a voice — especially if instead of a size 24, I become an 8 or a 10.

Therefore, today’s question is, what qualifications must be met before one can, with conviction and credibility, write about women’s plus size fashion. Does one have to be plus sized in order to do this? Heck, does one even have to be a woman in order to write about plus size fashion?

Well, the latter question is answered with a no, as Glen from Full Figure Plus writes about women’s plus size fashion all the time.

But the other question, for me, is harder to answer. The designer of a well-received brand in the plus size world, Igigi, is not a plus size woman in the slightest. Yet her line of clothing has turned women’s heads and made us all collectively drool (and collectively wince over the price tag) over those collections.

I’m a blogger that writes about women’s plus size fashion, who is also plus sized herself. However, I’m reaching a part of my life where I need to get active. Am I silently slapping the faces of silent multitudes who aren’t down with the weight loss train? I certainly hope not, though I feel as if I post progress on my weight loss or anything health-wise, I will undoubtedly step on some toes.

You want to know something about weight loss and Deluxegrrl? It’s been a hard ride. I’ve given up soda, candy, chocolate (for the most part. I do slip in a little dark chocolate as a treat every now and again), ice cream (now reserved as a once in a while treat), and fast food (though I still order a steak at a nice restaurant). Am I going to plus size hell for giving up the grease? I surely hope not, but since I kinda exist in a bubble, I’d appreciate comments at this point.

Whenever someone talks about weight loss, especially a plus size person, I almost feel like a million people are sighing, like “oh no, not another ex-big-girl-to-be!” It’s not like I’m going to go from a 24 to a 2, I just don’t have that type of build. But even at 19 going on 20, I have to get real: diabetes, high blood pressure, and other ailments are a huge problem in my family, and the thought of jabbing myself three times a day (or more, my mom definitely had to poke herself a lot more than that!) with a needle is not my idea of a good time.

I’m not saying that every plus sized person is on the same wavelength as me, or faces the same problems as me. I know several that are healthy as horses, and could outrun me on a bad day. But I’m taking control of this weight loss issue for my health, and therefore I might have to break away from traditional thought on the plus size manner.

If I was doing this for looks, I’d laugh at myself. I’m no starlet, but I definitely get enough attention when I’m out being just plain old Isabella. So I don’t wish to do this for the “hot factor”, since my ego tells me I’m hot as is. But when it comes to describing myself, I’d prefer elegant over hot, it seems to last longer.

OK, I’m done. Discuss.

Tags: weight, weight loss, size, size acceptance, plus size, plus size community, community

Happy Easter / Resurrection Sunday to those observing the holiday, and to those still surviving Pesach (Passover), happy no-leavening remembrance to you too! OK, I’m suffering silently, but it’s not helping that Martha’s in the kitchen making hot crossed buns so good I want to reach into the tv and take them all!

Some of you may know that I’ve been bouncing back and forth between choosing a way of eating. Why didn’t I mention the dreaded “D” word? Because we know all about that. I want to talk about a way of eating — it may be high fiber / high protein, low carb, low fat, low calorie. Whatever your “diet” (which really should just describe what you shove into your yap. I shove lots of kosher, organic, and often high carb things into my trap. However, now I’m a little smarter about what I shove into my yap.) consists of, it’s a personal choice that only turns public when we socialize …but since food is also culture, it bears discussion here as well.

I have often wondered why I am so obsessive about personally curbing food in various ways. I’ve gone nuts over carbs, slashing and burning like an angry flame zipping through a forest. I’ve declared a war on sugar, cutting away sugary sodas. OK, so I’m proud of giving up my soda. Unfortunately, I haven’t really seen the results of that.

I drink 100% juice, even though it has lots of carbs, and I try to eat as much organic food as possible. That part doesn’t quite bother me.

But I can’t keep counting. I can’t keep counting calories, carbs, fat… I can limit my portions.
I can’t keep stressing that I only manage to get 25 minutes of cardio at the gym, while other women there can do an hour or more. I can only worry about myself.

I cannot believe how sick I’ve made myself…maybe not physically, but mentally. I feel terrible to admit this, but I also feel terrible if I didn’t mention it. I’d be doing all of you a great disservice. I’m not perfect, and never will be.

I’ve been silent here on DG for a while because of this. It’s odd, and embarassing to say on a public blog where THOUSANDS of you are viewing this every month, but there it is. I never realized how depressed this has made me until today. So in a way, I do apologize — I haven’t done my job. Writing this blog post just might help someone else.

We’re all smart, dynamic, amazing women. I was going to keep this private, but I wanted to share it with all of you. Thank you for listening.

Y’all have probably heard this video again.

Favorite quote from the video: “Throw out the clothes that you can’t wear anymore. They’re just taking up space, and PISSING YOU OFF!”

Thoughts, ladies and gents?

Even though I’m moving towards low-carb eating after Passover/Unleavened Bread/First Fruits, I still hear loud and clear what she’s saying! Rockin’.

Oh yeah, and the woman is BEAUTIFUL. Oh man.

My words stem from personal experience. This post is short (edit: OK, it wanted to be short…), but I want to underscore a few things:

You are worthy. It’s not a conditional thing, something you lose. You’re worthy 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, 365 days a year.

You’re worthy even if he leaves.
You’re worthy even if you gain a pound.
You’re worthy even if you can’t seem to remember the milk.
You’re worthy even if the kids have an off day.
You’re worthy even if you and your mother-in-law never see eye to eye.

You’re worthy even if you forget to send a Valentine’s Day card.
You’re worthy even if the alarm clock fails to launch.
You’re worthy even if the neighbors outdo you.
You’re worthy even if you burn water.
You’re worthy even if the house is a mess.

You’re worthy even if that lone white sock will never find its partner.
You’re worthy even if no one laughs at your jokes.
You’re worthy even if the “cool kids” think you’re a dork.
You’re worthy even if those skinny jeans don’t fit anymore.

You’re worthy even if every guy in the room can’t get enough of the Dallas cheerleaders.
You’re worthy even if it rains and you just washed the car.
You’re worthy even if you’re too short to change the overhead light (even with the ladder!!)
You’re worthy even if the car won’t start because you left your cell phone charger in the cigarette power plug thingy (all of you know what I’m talking about; I’m just the first one to admit it)

You’re worthy even if your teacher can’t stand your latest essay.
You’re worthy even if you’re wearing white boots after Labor Day.
You’re worthy, worthy, worthy, because you’re here!

I don’t think we can have enough discussion of worth, and attempts to share good self-esteem is important.
Going through my recent/current breakup, I have to always remember that I’m /worthy/ regardless of my relationship status.

Why am I writing about something so personal on a plus size fashion website? Simple. For women, it’s never about one specific thing. It’s always related — we buy clothes that make us feel good, we shop to take our minds off what’s going on elsewhere.

I’ve bought pretty things, went on vacation — even went out for something to eat — and I still have to deal with being a party of one instead of pair of deuces. It’s an experience that hurts, but it’s also an amazing magnifying glass for yourself — you get to see everything you’ve been putting off, and realizing that you should never have to put off a thing.

Now I’m off to finish my articles, lest my darling editor (I LOVE Aja!) get thrown off course.

(of course, even if I don’t make it, I’m still worthy…though woefully unprofessional.) *runs*

Whoa! I didn’t know that America Ferrera, the star of Ugly Betty, was apart of Real Women Have Curves. I’m watching Live With Regis & Kelly, and my eye can’t stop following Ms. Ferrera! For one, she actually looks stunning — with this kinda imperfect hourglass figure that I absolutely adore.

I’ve only seen one ep of “Ugly Betty”, and I absolutely loved it. It amuses me that the whole premise of the show is that this woman is hired so that the boss won’t sleep with her. I’d definitely have my eye of “Ugly Betty”, and her real-life alter ego

The wit, grace, charm, and beauty that radiates from Ms. Ferrera’s character makes me warm and toasty, while being angry and bitchy at the same time. The women who are supposedly “hot” on the show are (to me, at least) the ugliest people I’ve ever seen!

Now I’m going to wander off and grab all the previous ep’s. *grin* Are y’all watching this show? Tell me your thoughts — we are the viewers!

I received a comment on my “Real Woman Dollar Conundrum” piece from a few months back. The commenter’s name is Exxie.

Comment:

I was a manager for LB when they were owned by The Limited Inc. and things have not changed much since they were purchased by Charming Shoppes Inc. They offer the nicest clothes in Plus sizes unless you want to go somewhere like Saks Fifth Avenue. Yeah, the prices can be high, but they have great sales and offers like the Real Woman Dollars. Sizing can differ from line to line as is the norm with any designer, you just have to find the ones that fit you properly. I don’t understand where you are going with the whole emotional shopping thing, body image affects people of all sizes, it’s like the big ladies think they deserve special allowances, better prices, etc.

There is always Wal-Mart if you think LB prices are too high….or Weight Watchers

Bold emphases belong to me, natch.

Now, I’m sorry if there are some of you that have a problem with the fact that I have something to say about the way we spend money, and the way companies treat us when we do it. I think if we’re to spend money, it’s important to look at all aspects of the place where we spend it. Coming into the plus size fashion game, I heard a lot about Lane Bryant. After finally experiencing the stores and purchasing items, I’m really not impressed.

But that’s me. If you’re a fan of LB, more power to you. Everyone’s got a brand they’re loyal to — I just haven’t found mine yet.

I don’t think that LB is the best out there for plus sizes — but it is popular. I think that is in part because some of our numbers believe that we should accept whatever’s out there. Again, if LB serves your needs, then I’m literally not talking to you. But if you’re left wondering what else is out there…oh, my friend, this journey is far from over.

To say, “the big ladies think they deserve…” smacks highly of someone who is sitting outside of plus size fashion. Perhaps the plethora of options you’re seeing in a normal size may make it difficult for you to see what plus size women are going through.

By the way, I’m not oblivious to what my slenderer sisters go through — I hear their complaints and they hear mine. We’re both trying to figure the road out — my apologies if you’re already reached enlightenment.

And the final insult of, “There is always Wal-Mart if you think LB prices are too high…or Weight Watchers” is cruel, inappropriate, and makes me wonder why you would step into a plus size woman’s site and spit such filth. If I’m alone in this, that doesn’t dull my anger — on the contrary. This is the fight for recognition coming to my door.

If plus size women don’t stand up to this type of attitude, then Ms. Exxie is right. There is always Wal-Mart. But I’m not going to walk into 2007 and have this attitude.

Last note, before I let this one go. My post was critiquing a sales method — my very first sentence said that my shopping experience was decent. What part of Ms. Exxie’s comment actually wants to try to discuss my actual post, instead of playing the LB cheerleader?

As much as I love plus size fashion, I think we tend to seperate ourselves from “mainstream” fashion problems and concerns, which isn’t the best road to take. MamaVision (along with back in skinny jeans) pointed me to a newspaper article on Diane von Furstenberg’s letter to fellow members of the Council of Fashion Designers of America that it’s time to address the “global fashion issue” of too-skinny models.

I know it looks like small steps, but the fact that Ms. “Head of the Council” Furstenberg took the time to address the issue sounds like there just might be a change in the wind.

Italy, Spain, Brazil and Israel all have policies on the table about underweight models. I think it’s a good start, even though I have my doubts about using BMI. BMI’s a rather flawed model in my opinion, but it’s better than the empty void that’s been going on all these years.

What saddens me is that all of this seems to be rolling into action because of models dying from being too thin. Considering that most of those models coming down the runway look so young, I’m sure that modeldeath is going to turn a few heads. Can’t have them dying, now can you?

It does feel almost a CYA operation as well, now that I think about it. As long as they weren’t dying, was it OK to have hyper-thin women wearing your fancy couture clothing? I mean, they were helping you make money. Now that Ana & Mia are in the spotlight after a few-too-many (yes, ONE death from eating disorders is already one too many) models are now in pine boxes when they didn’t need to be, now we’re getting people saying, “Hmm, maybe the skinny model thing is a bad idea.”

No matter the category, we all have our problems. I do think that plus size women are highly political in their own right, due to what we’re going up against. However, let’s never forget that in the long run, we’re all apart of the same clothes buying, model runway-walking, companies making dollars industry.

Our clothes are just bigger. The problems haven’t left the building.

Tags: body image, size, anorexia, ana, mia, social issues

I might not be on trial, but I have to go in and testify. If you’ve never been involved in a court case, it can be a little daunting. Since we’re still in Makeup Madness Month, I’m going to focus mainly on my makeup regimen for the next couple of days. Sadly, I won’t be able to post much until Thursday night or Friday.

Court is one of those places where it does pay to be somber. Loud colors on your face simply won’t do. The best key that’s helped me stay focused is to visualize court the same way I would visualize a business interview or an important presentation for work. I think it’s safe to leave the peacock eyeliner at home for this one.

That doesn’t mean I will be without color, but I think the glossies should stay home. Subtle reds, berries, browns, etc. should be perfectly fine. Light makeup - you’re not going on the town, you’re going in to give a statement.

Not being an eyeliner fan (yet!), I would reason that eyeliner won’t be too much of a problem, nor would mascara. Whatever you put on your face, make sure that it is built to last a few hours. You can’t really jump up and tell the judge, “Excuse me, I need to go fix my face - you mind?” Take full advantage of breaks.

Carry small hand tissues in your bag - no matter how tidy I am with the brush, I always have too much powder on my face. Other mishaps happen - I’ve found that the tissues are a very discreet, ladylike method that definitely tops clawing at your face (and therefore ruining your makeup).

Overall, take it seriously. Even if you’re just being called in to give a statement under oath, remember that “perception is reality”. Look good, feel good, and stay luxuriously deluxe - even under oath!

Demi Moore called: she wants her nude magazine cover shot back, Britney.

Or that’s what a lot of feedback from the blogosphere says. Naturally, I don’t think that Demi Moore is losing any sleep over what photos Britney Spears takes of herself, or what Britney does with her life. Therefore, I haven’t really paid too much attention to the story.

What I am paying attention to is the deeper issues around the story. I took a good long look at the pictures — they look very polished. Is that the polite term these days? Perhaps they aren’t doctored, but like most readers, I have a hard time believing that people in magazines aren’t touched up in some manner.

Push that Envelope!

I want to see this again.

I’ll give the rest of you a few seconds to bring your chins up off of the ground. I don’t mean to say that I necessarily want to see Britney again, but I want to see this concept again. I want to see a woman right off the street. Bonus points if she’s a plus sized woman. She doesn’t even have to be pregnant to satisfy this little dream of mine. Just being curvy and female would go for a lot more in my book.

I want to see curves, I want to see genuine smiles. I want to see happiness. And if we see another pregnant woman, can we see stretch marks? I want to see reality, I want to see a body untouched. I’m not going to say that this is an easy task, by a long shot - it’s embarassing to be out in the open without some sort of safety net. I still don’t have the guts to post my mug out to the world.

Mr. Deluxe — who is proud to be assimilated into my fashionable universe, I must say — argued with me about the latest episode of Britney. It went like this:

Me: Honey, Britney Spears posed naked on the cover of Harper’s Bazaar.
MrD: So?
Me: She’s pregnant.
MrD: Your point? Demi did that already.
Me: … (long sigh)
Me (continuing on): It’s still a big thing, but we need more. I think it’s important to show that pregnancy is natural, and not “hide” it away.
MrD (sounding surprised): It’s hidden?

He doesn’t see it because dear Mr. Deluxe is an ardent fan of pregnant women. He loves the “glow”, the promise of life inside the woman, and the “wobble”. I didn’t say he was normal. He tells me constantly that he loves women at any size, so long as they’re happy. It’s that accepting, loving attitude that makes me glad I got to him first!

Unfortunately, Mr. Deluxe has a different view on the matter because he has a scrapbook of pregnant women, the way other men collect swimsuit models. I still have pregnant friends that confide to me that they don’t feel sexy anymore, and that their husbands have confirmed this as well, albeit silently. It’s unfortunate either way you slice it.

Do I care about Britney’s photo stunt? Not necessarily. Does it worry me that the popular symbol for pregnancy and womanhood is a girl that barely looks pregnant, let alone real? Of course it does.

So, magazines - won’t you please give me a real woman? Give me curves, give me smiles, give me stretch marks and cellulite. I hope one day that the tide will turn and we’ll get what we’ve been clamoring for all this time: reality.

Tags: britney spears, magazines, plus size, size acceptance, perspectives,